Be mighty, and keep your axes sharp!
“Alone in HQ” is a satire, but maybe just barely.
Some thoughts about the illness permeating many corporations and those working for them…and the effect that had on this story. (Also, a bit about Ayn Rand and the framing device of Anthem as it pertains to “Alone in HQ.”)
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Femurs were wielded, and CEOs fell…
After the apocalypse, a lowly office worker is alive and alone in headquarters…keeping an old way of life going in the hope that things will one day return to normal…
Content Advisory: Death of a rabbit from blunt-force trauma. Violence (mention of a CEO bludgeoning someone with a cow femur). Suspense (the general creepiness of living in an empty corporate headquarters). Overtime and the stresses of work coming before life. Loneliness.
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Credits:
Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Kai Engel.
Story: Christopher Gronlund.
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“Taller than the Moon” is the first serious short story I ever wrote. It is roughly thirty years old.
Some thoughts about those early writing days — and literary fiction in general.
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A trip home to visit his parents brings with it a flood of memories for Michael Stokowski.
[Random side notes: I believe this is the first true short story I ever wrote. Also, it is the only story I can think of inspired by one of my dreams…]
Content Advisory: A family deals with the fallout of a suicide. Mention of drug addiction following serving in the Vietnam War.
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Credits:
Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Kai Engel.
Story: Christopher Gronlund.
Moon Image: Luca Huter.
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Most stories you’ve listened to, here, are polished first drafts.
Especially where short stories are concerned, I do not subscribe to the notion that the first draft of everything is shit.
Some thoughts about that, and how it worked with the recent Christmas episode.
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Last year’s holiday-ish 7-Stories episode, featuring a handful of micro-fiction, was well received. So this year, it’s another handful of stories:
Content Advisory: “The Crock”: Swearing and family rivalry (mother in law vs. daughter in law). “Greetings”: Job loss and swearing. “Naughty”: Swearing and cigar smoking. Child torture.
Credits:
Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch
Stories: Christopher Gronlund
Narration: Cynthia Griffith, Patrick K. Walsh, and Christopher Gronlund.
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Waking the Lumberjack is the first one-shot audiodrama I’ve done with multiple voice actors for Not About Lumberjacks. Anchoring the story is Tim Czarnecki, starring as the Narrator.
I sat down with Tim and chatted about what it was like narrating this story…
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In honor of another year of Not About Lumberjacks, it’s a wrasslin’ story I swear has nothing to do with lumberjacks!
The funeral service of “Big Papa” Howe, the Ontario Lumberjack, does not go as planned. It’s up to his two sons, Big Mike and Little Mike, to put an old rivalry to rest.
Content Advisory: Swearing. Cartoonish violence (professional wrestling). Death of a parent and a funeral.
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Credits:
Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Power and Beauty.
Story: Christopher Gronlund
Starring: Tim Czarnecki as the Narrator.
Michael Howie as Big Mike Howe.
Christopher Gronlund as Little Mike Howe…doing a really bad Canadian accent.
Rocky Westbrook as The Wrestling Fan.
Cynthia Griffith as Mama Howe.
Shawn Kupfer as Dicky Coffee Guy and Father Kupfer.
Rick Coste as Big Rick Coaster.
Additional wrestlers and grunting provided by various talent listed above.
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Howdy, howdy, howdy. Christopher here with a random update.
This is mostly being recorded and released in support of this episode of the ScreamQueenz Podcast.
ScreamQueenz is a fun look at cheesy horror films, but in October it gets a bit more serious. Not the show, because the show is always light-hearted fun! But in October, show host Patrick Walsh does a pod-o-rama to raise funds for New Alternatives NYC.
New Alternatives helps homeless LGBTQ+ youth. It’s a cool thing, and very dear to Patrick’s heart…and his friends. So I’m posting this in the hope you will go here and donate at least $21 — a dollar for each consecutive day Patrick releases episodes until Halloween! (You know what my release schedule is like, here…so imagine DAILY episodes. That’s crazy! But that’s how much this means to Patrick, who is simply a damn good human being.)
How good a person is Patrick? Well…when “The Hidebehind” narrator, Michael Howie, visited New York City, Patrick insisted on taking this photo to include me in a way because I wasn’t there hanging out with them.
Dawwwwwww…ain’t they the cutest!
I mention those two because…today’s episode of ScreamQueenz features Michael Howie and I talking about Dave Made a Maze with Patrick. Three bearded gents talking about a fun movie. That’s snazzy!
But wait, there’s more! I also talk about what’s going on with me, lately, in this episode…and share what will be released for at least the next four months on Not About Lumberjacks.
So, again, if you want to donate to a good cause, go here.
If you want to hear Michael, Patrick, and I talk about Dave Made a Maze (and other things), go here.
Thanks so much. I’ll be back later this month with a story about a kid who makes a monster in his bathtub.
– Christopher
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“Dear God” is not the first story I wrote featuring gods; in fact, it’s not the first story I’ve written for Not About Lumberjacks featuring gods.
Gods are strange things to me. I’m a life-long atheist, but I love the storytelling opportunities gods of all kinds offer.
Also, I might just talk about how the Marvel Thor movies influenced this episode…and how they didn’t. (In many ways, an old Dungeons and Dragons rule book should probably get the most credit for the story.)
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Also, I mention a friend named Laura Lange in this episode.
It just-so-happens that the day I release this episode of Behind the Cut…that Laura released an episode of her show, The Peaceful Life Podcast, in which she and I talk about being bullied as children. We talk about a Not About Lumberjacks favorite story, “Purvis” — as well as Dungeons and Dragons and many other things.
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